Alternative Lives of Cartoon Characters

Well you know that the Neo-Con's are afraid of a gay Spongebob, and that strange, fruity Teletubby. How come they aren't bitching about their predecessors. This is surprising since there are some pretty shady characters out there.

Let's start with probably the most popular Hanna Barbera character, Scooby Doo and his gang. You got a commune on 4 wheels traipsing from town to town. Shaggy and Scooby are of course total stoners. It's an easy call, they are always half asleep and got the munchies when they aren't out cold. If you have a problem with gay then you should be harping on Fred, gay as an Easter Parade. Ever see Fred put a move on Daphne? Nope, only reason he wasn't trying to bang Shaggy is that you can tell he's a neat freak and a dirty beatnick that smells like Great Dane wouldn't cut it. I can't confirm it but I think Velma and Daphne have been bumping it in the Mystery Machine.

These traditionalists should be throwing fits about Jonny Quest. Here is a kid being put in dangerous situations by the negligence of his thrill seeking father and his live in lover. Totally unhealthy environment. Hell they even bought some poor Indian kid to keep him company so they wouldn't have to bother.

What of Mr. Peabody and Sherman. Sherman is his "assistant". Yea right, Peabody is a total chickenhawk manipulating this boy for his twisted thrills. He's probably gone through a number of "assistants" who have since disappeared. Sherman is even mentioned as his "pet boy" so there is some fucked-up dominant-submissive thing going on there.

There is much more that can be said about the "good old" cartoons. So you old fashioned types, these new cartoon chacters aren't any more deviant than the old ones they may just not try to hide it as well.