Actionnnn: Stupid Movie Tricks: Pt 1

Action movies, when good keep your adrenaline up and your heart pounding. When bad they make your brain numb and your ass as well. When action movies go bad fast is when they start trotting out some typically ridiculous action sequences that are in there to develop more drama, generally because the writes it too fucking lazy to develop it intelligently. Here we go with stupid plot points that are thrown in to extend a story that much longer.

Clear! How to keep a movie from ending prematurely

Yawn of the Dead - World's oldest trick, hero seemingly kills bad guy. Hero starts to walk away and .. Oh My God... bad guy has one last shot left in him. Didn't see that coming did ya. Hey, Mr. Hero, when the movie makes you out to be an expert or something special in general, then don't act like a rank amateur and make sure the bastard is dead or unarmed.

The Houdini Factor - As the hero is putting on his jammies and ready to retire for the movie, the bad guy escapes because he is A.) Extremely brilliant and MacGyvers an escape tool out of toothpaste, condom and popscicle stick B.) Not necessarily that smart but has henchmen to take out the guards who have apparently barely figured out they have opposable thumbs. C.) Pulls a Yawn of The Dead on the lesser ape police/guards after him D.) Just flat walks past the morons

Witless Protection Program - Right before the trial that would put the bad guy in jail, a witness, usually a beautiful woman, child or heroes family member is taken from police protection. In movies, cops lose more witnesses than I lose phone numbers. I admit to not being too up on the news, but I haven't heard of too many witness-nappings or murders. I think I know why, trying to track down the safe house, put together a hit squad and go after the cops is pretty damn difficult when the cops are already watching you! That's right... if you are a big enough threat to war