MTV makes me want to use my .357 for a remote control

While talking to my friend Hez we both switched on to MTV just for kicks. I rarely watch MTV, because it seems that virtually all of it's programming is hip-hop, rap or Top 40. The majority of that just sucks in my opinion. Furthermore, MTV has reveled in catering to the lowest common denominator for a while. It took just a few videos to remind me why I hate MTV.

Let's start with your average rap/hip-hop video. It will contain the artist and...

A) His entourage B)Hot Ass Girls C)Everyone from the neighbrohood

The location will be

A) Nightclub B) In or around a mansion, especially the pool C) A stage with video/light display backing them up D)The neighborhood

Typically the artists will perform while everyone else around them will be dancing. And there you have it, hip hop video made simple.

I saw a video from Gwen Stefani, don't know what the song was but it was pathetic. She was dressed up like a chola and hanging out with all the homies. Give me a fucking break Gwen, are you that desperate to grab some fans that you are flitting back and forth from one makeover style to another. It's like she is spinning the Ethnic Identity Wheel, "Oh look it came up Stereotyped Urban Latina, wheeeeeee". Hey, maybe this is who she really is, which begs the question who the hell was she all those years before and did her husband realize it. Hope you enjoy your new lifestyle Gwen, at least until you switch to a new one.

Oh, and then in minutes we got the Black Eyed Peas. I will give them credit for making a fitting song for NBA promos with Let's Get It Started. They basically pissed away all that goodwill with everything else. The songs are godawful and they're biggest attraction, Fergie just looks like a porn star on the downhill slope of her career. She either looks pretty worn or looks like someone was liberal with the cosmetic work. I think even I could score with her if I had some high quality junk on me. I know I know I shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. When the book is worn, stained and being rubbed against someone's crotch, whaddaya gonna do?

So MTV, I salute you for bringing music videos to the masses. Then abandoning them altogether until you decided to spin off several other channels eventually going with MTV Hits and MTV Jams which generally look to be the same. You've set the bar low, let's hope we can reach it.