Conservatives Rock

My friend blogged about the list of 50 Greatest Conservative Rock Songs
This of course is much like the list of the 50 Most Influential African Americans in Indie Rock or the 50 Greatest Japanese R&B Singers. The author, John Miller who I will refer to as J. Dingleberry McFucktardleroy III sifted through the letters of his readers and dug long and hard to find some gems. Some thoughts from his quotes:

"What makes a great conservative rock song? The lyrics must convey a conservative idea or sentiment, such as skepticism of government or support for traditional values" Yea, liberals aren't skeptical of government. Funny, it seems like the majority of liberals I know are very skepitcal of government, especially when filled with lying weasels and fuckheads who stumble around busting up the planet. Oh, and what are traditional values? Ethnocentrism? One "Right" religion? I am really curious

More, by song #

1. "Won't Get Fooled Again" by The Who - "The conservative movement is full of disillusioned revolutionaries; this could be their theme song, an oath that swears off naïve idealism once and for all.Yea, disillusioned they haven't been able to tell everyone else how to live their lives morally and codify those thoughts into law. Also haven't been able to bring back the glory days of tickle down economics. Oh and all of these "revolutionaries" should swear off this naive idealism. So, forget about trying to change the future it's so naive. I guess sticking it out with the status quo is the new Revolutionary. Well, nothing like stick-to-it-ness.

3. "Sympathy for the Devil" - "What’s more, he is the sinister inspiration for the cruelties of Bolshevism" Ooooh scary. Bolshevism pretty much went tits up as a viable threat more than 10 years ago. Time to move on.

4. "Sweet Home Alabama" - "A tribute to the region of America that liberals love to loathe, taking a shot at Neil Young’s Canadian arrogance along the way" If you were black, Alabama wasn't so sweet. About 7 years before Young's Southern Man, Martin Luther King Jr. wrote Letter From A Birmingham Jail. 5 Years before Alabama State Troopers beat the shit out of peaceful marchers in Selma, Alabama. Was Alabama the only place like that? Absolutely not. It took The Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965 to ensure African Americans had a hope of playing on a level playing field. Young's song embodied the disgust of people over the racism that choked the life of African Americans in many parts of the South at that time. Damn those arrogant Canadians for hating racism. Let's sing happy songs and give anyone who doesn't like our little way of life the finger.

I could go on and on. This list is chock full of bullshit. He reaches and tries to ascribe conservative ideals to many songs where they don't belong. He also lists a number of songs that are from such a different era that you would be considered to be considerably backwards to still identify with them. Oh, and I want to point out a particularly fucked observation regarding #28 Janie's Got A Gun "How the right to bear arms can protect women from sexual predators" Pathetic. I in fact support the right to bear arms, but using that as an example of how it is GOOD is just reaching. In fact it would have been more gratifying if it was Janie Cut His Cock Off With a Dull Knife. I suppose that tite wouldn't allow it to be sold in Wal-Mart though.

Well, I could call this guy a name all day, but I've had enough